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This week, I had the opportunity to sit down with my husband Alejandro or Alex Cuevas for the second time and reflect on our parenting journey over the past year. It was an engaging conversation, filled with laughter, honesty, and some surprising revelations.

A Year in Review

As I opened the episode, I couldn’t help but express how much has happened since we last recorded. We’ve transitioned from a shared space at my parents’ house while we remodeled our home, to now embracing life in a one-bedroom Chicago apartment with our two little boys. This move was part of a strategic effort to build generational wealth, a choice not typically seen in families of four, but one that has been enriching and challenging in equal measure. Our current living conditions in a smaller space have added a layer of complexity to parenting. But I am incredibly grateful for having Alex alongside me, navigating the chaos and beauty of raising two energetic boys together. We’ve made it work, but it has definitely required adaptability and patience. 

Parenting Without a Physical Village 

A significant part of our conversation revolved around the lack of a traditional ‘village.’ Growing up in a multi-generational household, I was used to constant familial support. Now, with my family living further away, Alex and I are learning how to be each other’s village. This change has been difficult for me, but Alex brought a refreshing perspective on the matter. He grew up without such a village and shared that our little family unit is enough for him. His views provided comfort and a new lens through which to see our current situation.

Breaking Generational Cycles 

A focal point of our discussion was how we’re actively trying to break generational cycles in parenting. Alex opened up about not wanting to emulate certain aspects of his upbringing. He wants our kids to feel comfortable expressing their emotions, a stark contrast to the environment he grew up in. Similarly, we talked about setting boundaries with our own families, and how crucial it is for maintaining healthy relationships.

Balancing Work, Parenthood, and Partnership 

Work-life balance, particularly in a cramped space where our boys are attached to us round the clock, is another area we’ve had to navigate carefully. Alex’s job allows him the flexibility to work from home, which has been both a blessing and a challenge. We also addressed how we handle internal stress to avoid projecting it onto each other. While Alex tends to internalize stress, I wear my emotions on my sleeve – traits that require us to constantly communicate to ensure we’re supporting each other effectively.

Takeaways for Mamis & Their Partners

Our candid talk led to several takeaways that I hope resonate with our listeners: 

1. Cherish Your Partner: Whether it’s complimenting one another or sharing struggles, maintaining a strong partnership is essential in parenting. 
2. Embrace Vulnerability: Opening up to one another and setting boundaries, whether with family or within our relationship, is key to breaking generational patterns. 
3. Adapt and Evolve: Parenting is an ever-changing journey. Adapting to new challenges while maintaining your values is an ongoing process. 
4. Being Your Village: Sometimes, your immediate family unit can be enough. It’s about quality love and support, not just quantity. 
5. Communication is Crucial: Continually talking about your feelings and experiences enables growth and understanding in relationships. 

 

This episode serves as a yearly check-in and a moment for us to reflect on our parenting journey and share our evolving story with you. I hope that in sharing our experiences, we continue to build a community of encouragement and support for other parents navigating their unique paths. Thank you for tuning in, and if you haven’t listened yet, I invite you to join us for an honest look at life, love, and parenthood. Your journey may be different, but we’re all walking this path together.